زمرد
04-16-2005, 05:38 PM
Hi every body...
How are you?
Hope you're fine & doing well
Today I brought you some of funny jokes .Enjoy them
http://www.asmilies.com/smiliespic/happy/003.gif
Slapped
The story is told of a young Czechoslovakian man , a Russian
officer , an old lady and an attractive young woman riding on a train
Shortly after the train entered a dark tunnel , the passengers heard akiss , then a loud slap
The young woman thought: "Isn't that odd the Russian tried to kiss the old lady and not me?"
The old lady thought: "That is a good girl with fine morals".
The Russian officer thought: "That Czech is a smart fellow: he steals a kiss and I get slapped".
The Czeck thought:" Perfect.I clout a Russian officer , kiss the back of my hand ,and get away with it".
http://www.asmilies.com/smiliespic/happy/003.gif
Last word
Three buddies die in a car crash , they go to heaven to an orientation
They are all asked :"When you are in your casket and friends and family are mourning up on you, what would you like to hear them say about you ?. The first guy says,"I would like to hear them say that I was a great doctor of my time and a great family man".
The second guy says:"I would like to hear that say that I was a wonderful husband and school teacher which made a huge difference in our children of tomorrow".
The last guy replay :" I would like to hear them say: look he is moving ".
http://www.asmilies.com/smiliespic/happy/003.gif
What is intelligence?
Two men were dgging a ditch on a very hot day. One said to the other :Why are we down in this hole digging a ditch when our boss is standing up there in the shade of a tree?" " I don't know" "I'll ask him".
So he climbed out of the hole and went to his boss :" Why are we digging in the hot sun and you're standing in the shade?" "Intelligence." the boss said."What do you mean_intelligence?"
The boss said :"Well, I'll show you. I'll put my hand on this tree and I want you to hit it with your fist as hard as you can ." The ditch digger took a mighty swing and tried to hit the boss' hand. The boss removed his hand and the ditch digger hit the tree .The boss said:" That's intelligence".
The ditch digger went back to his hole. His friend asked :"What did he say ?" "He said we are down here because of in telligence." "What's intelligence?" said the friend. The ditch digger put his hand on his face andsaid :"Take your shovel and hit my hand".
http://www.asmilies.com/smiliespic/happy/003.gif
Fresh Marriage Breakfast
Not long after ther wedding. Scott and Tracy a woke early one morning. The couple had been up for quit a while before they met up in the kitchen.
Marriage was agreeing with Scott, and he greeted his new wife with glee and excitation that morning.
"If you'll make the toast and pour juice , sweetheart".
Said Tracy the newlywed bride :"Breakfast will be ready".
"Great ! What are we having for breakfast?" asked Scott.
" Toast and juice".replied Tracy.
http://www.asmilies.com/smiliespic/happy/003.gif
How are you?
Hope you're fine & doing well
Today I brought you some of funny jokes .Enjoy them
http://www.asmilies.com/smiliespic/happy/003.gif
Slapped
The story is told of a young Czechoslovakian man , a Russian
officer , an old lady and an attractive young woman riding on a train
Shortly after the train entered a dark tunnel , the passengers heard akiss , then a loud slap
The young woman thought: "Isn't that odd the Russian tried to kiss the old lady and not me?"
The old lady thought: "That is a good girl with fine morals".
The Russian officer thought: "That Czech is a smart fellow: he steals a kiss and I get slapped".
The Czeck thought:" Perfect.I clout a Russian officer , kiss the back of my hand ,and get away with it".
http://www.asmilies.com/smiliespic/happy/003.gif
Last word
Three buddies die in a car crash , they go to heaven to an orientation
They are all asked :"When you are in your casket and friends and family are mourning up on you, what would you like to hear them say about you ?. The first guy says,"I would like to hear them say that I was a great doctor of my time and a great family man".
The second guy says:"I would like to hear that say that I was a wonderful husband and school teacher which made a huge difference in our children of tomorrow".
The last guy replay :" I would like to hear them say: look he is moving ".
http://www.asmilies.com/smiliespic/happy/003.gif
What is intelligence?
Two men were dgging a ditch on a very hot day. One said to the other :Why are we down in this hole digging a ditch when our boss is standing up there in the shade of a tree?" " I don't know" "I'll ask him".
So he climbed out of the hole and went to his boss :" Why are we digging in the hot sun and you're standing in the shade?" "Intelligence." the boss said."What do you mean_intelligence?"
The boss said :"Well, I'll show you. I'll put my hand on this tree and I want you to hit it with your fist as hard as you can ." The ditch digger took a mighty swing and tried to hit the boss' hand. The boss removed his hand and the ditch digger hit the tree .The boss said:" That's intelligence".
The ditch digger went back to his hole. His friend asked :"What did he say ?" "He said we are down here because of in telligence." "What's intelligence?" said the friend. The ditch digger put his hand on his face andsaid :"Take your shovel and hit my hand".
http://www.asmilies.com/smiliespic/happy/003.gif
Fresh Marriage Breakfast
Not long after ther wedding. Scott and Tracy a woke early one morning. The couple had been up for quit a while before they met up in the kitchen.
Marriage was agreeing with Scott, and he greeted his new wife with glee and excitation that morning.
"If you'll make the toast and pour juice , sweetheart".
Said Tracy the newlywed bride :"Breakfast will be ready".
"Great ! What are we having for breakfast?" asked Scott.
" Toast and juice".replied Tracy.
http://www.asmilies.com/smiliespic/happy/003.gif